Thursday, January 21, 2010

Day 43

Footprints of Death...............

Still raining in usually sunny California. It's great to have the rain but many people here do not seem to know how to drive, so it's a mess. Lol! Today I awoke, watched my favorite Pastor on t.v., spoke my daily confessions, prayed, worked out, did housework, prepared for a midterm, and now it's 8:21 p.m. Amazing! It's like time is sped up.

Grief seems to be diminishing for me, I mean in terms of the heavy heart and sadness. I am still very affected by sad or mean situations....they make me cry. I am praying for the people of Haiti because I cannot even fathom that kind of devastation, but I cannot watch the events on television, it's just too much for me right now.

I want to go over where I am in the BAADD (5 stages of grief) process in a little more detail tonight. Bargaining, not at all, who would I bargain with at this point? Lol! Acceptance, I have totally accepted the loss of both of my parents. Anger, I did not have a manifestation today but when pushed I can get angry fast, but I am able to control and constrain myself. Depression tries to be a constant, but I fight it with all that I have. Prayer, exercise, God's Spirit, God's Word, and eating right also helps me to combat depression. Denial, not so much, as I am fully aware of my losses but I remain in unbelief.

As always, remember to laugh, live, and love always and intentionally because tomorrow is not promised.

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