Today was another rainy day in Southern California. Rain is so beautiful to me!!! I just had a heart of gratitude today. I am so grateful for the path that my life has taken. I absolutely unequivocally love the person that God made me. I value my God, myself, my family, and loved ones. I just have no words for the destiny that God has for my life.
Grief has a wonderful way of peeling back the corrosion around your life. I am confident that when this process is over I will have an awesome life. I mentioned this in an earlier blog, but I believe it really rings true. I think the acronym for d.e.a.t.h. stand for Decreasing External Activities That Hinder. Death, which caused grief, gave me just enough pause to take inventory of my life and decide to continue to pursue my destiny in more precise ways. I am always amazed by revelations like this because they give me hope, when situations seem hopeless.
About the sweets, I have not had a cake, or pie, or cupcake in about 2 weeks. In that time, I have lost 7 pounds. I am headed in the right direction. I am headed in the direction of wholeness (mind, soul, body, spiritually, financially). Being aware of my emotions and grief emotions keeps me in a state of awareness that has me eating to live and not eating to escape from life. I'm proud of me!!!
Now's time for the BAADD (5 stages of grief) process for the day:
Bargaining - Not at all.
Acceptance - Totally.
Anger - Not today, just gratefulness.
Denial - No, just unbelief.
Depression- Fighting my way out and determined to win!!!
It's amazing how two months ago I did not think that I was going to make it after the loss of my Dad, just because I felt like my fight was gone, especially after I spent months fighting the healthcare system, and filing reports against the hospital that neglected my Dad's care, etc. Now, I know that I still have a purpose but the purpose (fight) is for myself.
As always, remember to laugh, live, and love always and intentionally.
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