Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Day 14

Footprints of Death...............

I want everyone to have a safe and Merry Christmas! No matter what, try to enjoy the family that you have and if you do not have family then find friends that love you and spend time with them. Tell the people in your life that you love them because we never know when it could be our last time to tell them.

Today was a good day. As I stated in previous blogs I like sweets (i.e. cookies, cupcakes, etc). In the past when life was rough I ate "sweets" because in my mind I was making my life a little sweeter by eating the sweets. Needless to say, my self medicating with "sweets" did not heal my emotional issue of wanting to make life sweeter. In fact, in the long run, the sweets just made me gain weight and almost made me diabetic. Thank God I changed my ways about a year in half ago......but then the death of my Dad came along and I must confess I had a relapse. I was driving to the best bakeries in town to find beautiful sweet treats. I realized that I was hurting myself so three days ago I made a decision to stop eating the sweets again. I prayed and asked God to help me see that life is sweet just because I have life. I also asked God to heal whatever emotional void that I was trying to fill by eating the sweets. I said all of that to say, I have NOT had super sweet cupcakes, cookies, etc in 3 days and I have lost 3 lbs. Amazing!!! Like the process of grief I am taking my "no sweets" stance day by day. Also, like dealing with the process of grief, I have to consciously pay attention to what I am eating (sweet wise) and why I am eating it, then ask God for his supernatural help to abstain from sweets. I think that we all have people or things that we run to when things go wrong in life, the problem is, we usually turn to things that are NOT good for us (i.e. alcohol, drugs, food, sex). As for me I have chosen to treat my temple with respect and trust God to help me keep it healthy.

As for the 5 Stages of Grief (BAADD) process, I am in the same place as I was yesterday. Ok, by now, you know how we do it (smile)!

Bargaining - Not at all, you can only bargain for something that you can attain.
Acceptance - Totally
Anger - No manifestations like last week, so that's good.
Denial - Not so much
Depression - Coming out by faith!

Because life is precious, please remember to laugh, live, and love often.

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