Saturday, March 20, 2010

Day 95

Footprints of Death...............

Today was an interesting day. I had a strong sense of wonder that I have not had in a long while. Today, I was wondering about how my life will play out in the absence of my parents. Where will I end up? What will I do in my career? Do I like the direction that I am going in now? What does life hold for me? Despite all of these questions in my mind I still feel a sense of anticipation. It's kinda hard to envision my life without the people that loved me the most being here to see it and or experience it with me. Weird, right?

Anyway, it's been over 4 months since my Dad passed away and it seems like time is flying. Some days it seems like time is moving way too fast for me because I would like to take more time and smell the daisies but I keep having to move faster than I would like.

Now for the BAADD (5 stages of grief) process:

Bargaining- Not at all, I realize that both of my parents are gone.
Acceptance- Totally.
Anger- No. No manifestations or seething anger.
Denial-No, just unbelief.
Depression-Not so much, feeling better.

I intend to laugh, live, and love to the fullest despite temporary uncertainties. Lol!

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